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Train Roll On

Friday, January 8th, 2010

What gets you through tough times? I lost the only cushion I’ve found so now it’s back to square one. My Tuesday is gone. :-( I’m listening to some music, it’s rough. “My baby’s gone with the wind…”

“I don’t know… ohhh where I’m going… I just want to be left alone…”

I’m working on healing here both mentally and physically. I’m exercising my arm regularly as part of my physical therapy. In a few weeks I’ll be good to go and then I’m moving. I’ll get a job for the interim and I’m going to try to become a police officer. :-) I’ve decided I want to serve my community. I also want to get into some volunteer work. I’m not entirely sure what I’ll be doing on that front but I feel a need to serve mankind. I’m looking for happiness and I’m not getting it by serving just my own interests. Speaking of which, there’s some old toys from many years ago that I’d like to donate to St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital. Will this be my calling? I can’t say. It’s just something I gotta do. I feel sorry for the folks that depend on a job and feel they are stuck to it. I’ll do what I need to do to survive but I’ll be damned if I stay somewhere because I feel I have no other choice. If that job isn’t doing it for me, if it doesn’t make me happy… I’m moving on. Whether it’s a great paying job or shit it doesn’t matter. If there’s no happiness there it isn’t worth it to me.

“Tuesday… she… she had to be free… but somehow I got to carry on…”

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Thievery Rant

Wednesday, December 30th, 2009

Why do assholes steal? If they put as much energy as they do to get shit they could put it to work and actually EARN money. I’ve actually become accustomed to thieves and gave up caring. I’ll try to stop a thief if I see one but if I see something gone anymore I think “oh well.” It sucks for all the honest folk as prices rise to compensate for loss. It sucks for the workers who have to constantly get bitched about loss. It sucks for the company who makes more ridiculous moves to curb it. Theft affects everyone. The workers give up caring. Why try? If safeguards are put in then they’re later removed because of the inconvenience to customers. They figure X amount stolen is less than Y amount sold so go ahead. Then the vicious cycle restarts. Here’s an idea, let the common folk beat the shit out of thieves as deterrence without worrying about civil/criminal charges.

To all thieves: You’re not clever. You’re not sly. You’re not “owed” shit. No one cares about you. You should care about you and make the most of yourself. Get a job and earn it. No one owes you shit. You’re not above anyone though I’d posit that EVERYONE is above a thief. Join the ranks of everyone else.

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I Created The Sound Of Sadness

Tuesday, December 29th, 2009

Okay so I admit that’s not terribly clever but I don’t care. It kinda made me smile for a second today. Today I have been sooooo tired. I wasn’t feeling too well this morning either. Here’s a key – when you drink a bit of beer the previous night always drink some water and gatorade. Rehydration is the key. Now I didn’t have but 5 so that was nothing but I also had a bunch of spicy pizza and let’s just say the BS hit this morning. I had forgotten to drink anything so I was a little dehydrated as well. The key here was to eat greasy food when I felt better and keep drinking water.

That’s not the only thing though. (Oh wow, I just had a burp that tasted like a beer… almost 24 hours later. Weird.) Where was I? Ah yes. I’ve been feeling down all day like something bad is about to happen. I’m not sure what but it has me depressed.

I have no idea what I’m doing. I’m going to move but I don’t know what will happen thereafter. Am I afraid? Strangely, no. I have to get out of this place, I’m going nuts. I need something. Will I stay where I go? I hope so but I can’t say with any certainty. It’s a big move. I have to get closer to MSX. This is what *I* want. I’m doing it for me and hopefully for her. If not, oh well, this is what I want to do. I never mean to discredit her opinion but I know I put her in an awkward position of making it feel like she is making me do this. Hell no, I’ve been thinking about moving forever and now is the time. I don’t care if she’ll be gone for a while by the time I get there. She will be back. I must be with her. Sigh. The anxiety will come, there IS some fear there but for the moment I’m good. Will she be there when I get there? How will things go? What about my job? There’s mounds of what-ifs but I’m just saying “fuck it” and doing it. I won’t let life pass me by, I’m going after what I want.

My boss told me yesterday I have good leadership skills. I can see that but I’ve never really been in that position before. I don’t want to lead, that’s not my style, but if I’m stuck in the position I will do it. I haven’t really thought about it beyond that. What I was thinking mostly of today was where am I going? What do I want to do? What do I love that would make for a good job?

I love guns. I love the beauty of them and the mechanics and the physics. I like figuring out how machines work. I like football. I like video games. Can any of those be made into a useful skill? I don’t know. That’s what I’ve been pondering all day. That and I’ve been thinking about MSX, things that should be and other stuff. I was a little worried about her again. Sigh. Why do I have to be so stupid at times? And why does life have to throw such curveballs?

I’m tired, I’m cranky, I’m sad. That’s the wrap up of my day. Like most people except I have a private blog to bitch on. Fuck off!

Posted in Beer, Ms. Sexy X, Myself, Work | No Comments »

Long Day Gone

Friday, November 27th, 2009

Today is another day of significance. I got a text from Ms. Sexy X and then a voicemail and another text later on. :-) She also called not too long ago.

I just stayed up all night and went to work Black Friday at 4AM. I was in charge of selling a game system. I told her I thought it was dumb to sit in line forever for $30 in savings. She got upset (not “upset” but you know…) that I would say that. What if I couldn’t afford… and I said I wouldn’t buy it then. She said if it were for my kids and I was trying to get them something.

God I’m a jackass. I was going to be stubborn on the point but she’s right and I’m right. For myself I’d forego the item. In the time to wait I could work and earn the difference and not mess with the hassle or I would just decide it’s not worth it. HOWEVER, if it were for her or my kids I would definitely do it. The hassle would be worth the smile. Way to go with foot in mouth again!

Now I do stand firmly behind the belief that it is absolutely retarded to get arrested over it by threatening the employees with their lives (I kid you not.) That shit isn’t worth violence over, in that case I will gladly spend my $30 elsewhere even if I had kids. They would need a daddy – one not in the jail or hospital or morgue.

The day was long but pretty smooth. There were a few hiccups. I was dragging maybe due to some lack of sleep but moreso because it was so confusing and time was just ticking by so slowly even when I was busy. Usually I have the opposite effect.

I came home and took a hot shower, a two hour nap, ate a sandwich and had a Guinness. I watched a movie and I’m probably about to watch another. I was feeling sad before the call but not so much now. Our call did get sort of cut off because my brother stopped by. I was a bit pissed but it happens.

So now I am tired, a little sad, and very lonely. I’m lonely without her, having others around just doesn’t alleviate that sense of feeling.

Things are going pretty well. I guess we’re on friend status. She’s my best friend so I gladly take that. I still love her though. I’m sure she loves me still but there’s that thing that’s going to take time. I hope she’ll give me a second chance but that’s down the road and will come if it comes. I miss her so much. I’m just thankful that she keeps in touch, I’d be so much more devastated otherwise.

I can’t wait to move. It’s scary but I can’t stand this place anymore. It’s not bad it’s just me. I feel uncomfortable as if I don’t belong here and I cannot shake that feeling. I’m about to make some exciting changes whatever they may be. I’m not even sure yet… I have a general plan but I’m ready to improvise at any given minute.

Posted in Ms. Sexy X, Myself, Work | No Comments »

The Trash Fire Is Warm

Saturday, November 7th, 2009

I had a blast jet skiing today. This was my first time… solo anyways. I have a vague remembrance of riding just a tiny bit with someone but I can’t place where. Maybe not. I probably rode around 16 miles in an hour and twenty minutes.

I talked with Ms. Sexy X again. Our call got cut off yet again. That’s really starting to piss me off. I’m not sure what it was this time. She might have gotten sick or the doctor may have cut her short yet again. I just want to have one full fucking conversation with her. There’s 2 things I really wanted to get to and I was getting to and it just ended.

I’ve been struggling within myself to find a solution. To find a job, to get everything I need. I’m sick of thinking about money and how to live. I’m sure everyone else is too. Why can’t I just have happiness? I know where it lies and yet I can’t touch it. That makes me miserable.

I’m sick of everything. My eyes seek reality and I can’t find any. I’m stumbling… blinded by sorrow and love. I’m trying to figure out how the fuck to do this. The sorrow is here to stay until she comes back. The love will always be here, it’s not a problem in of itself – not by a longshot.

The main problem that I have is the need to get out of my home state. I can’t stand to be there anymore. I just have to move. Where? Well, I don’t have any ties elsewhere so any place is just as good as the next. This place I’m at now would work. I’m just trying to figure out the job situation as well as the living situation. Yikes.

Posted in Ms. Sexy X, Myself, Work | No Comments »

Choke Out

Thursday, October 22nd, 2009

I went into work not feeling like doing shit. The machine was broke again and after spending 4.5 hours on it I gave up and went home early. That gave me from 1500 on to do whatever and with it being 70 and sunny, I opted to stay outside. What to do though? Well, it had been a while since I had a cigar so I got a glass of water, a Bolivar Cofradia No. 754, my dual torch lighter, cigar cutter, and put on some shorts and sat out on the deck. I smoked it for a good hour and twenty minutes down to the very end. It was very relaxing. I just sat outside thinking on what to do. I didn’t come up with a damned thing. I just have to take it a day at a time. I hate the uncertainty.

After that, I threw a football with my brother for about an hour. He stopped by and I was feeling energetic. So much so that I was going to go for a mile run. I don’t need to tell you that running after smoking isn’t a smart idea but fuck it. I barely made half a mile before resting for 2 minutes then running back a half mile. I was tired… not really out of breath but I figure I didn’t have a whole lot of oxygen in my system.

I went up to the roof right after to catch my breath and cool off and watch the sunset. Much to my dismay the clouds rolled in so I didn’t get to see much of anything. I went back inside and took a hot bath, I just soaked my legs for a good while before I showered. I watched the Ultimate Fighter and then watched “the Shining.” I forgot how looooooong that movie is. Jeez.

Rampage Jackson is such a dick. I don’t like him at all. He berates and berates. He is a horrible coach, he doesn’t build his guys up but merely talks smack about the opponents. It’s no wonder he is about to get sweeped just like last year. He kept calling Darrill “titties” even though his own boy Zac had bigger man boobs. Darrill is beastly for drinking that much alcohol especially when trying to get in shape to fight. Stupid. I wanted Zac to win, he’s a bit of a social outcast. He looked okay in the fight but kept his guard too low and took too many quick shots to the face. He had the nice and much needed takedown to escape defeat and he hammerfisted nicely. You could see how tired or dazed he was. He allowed himself to get into a triangle choke within Darrill’s legs. He held on for a long time but made no attempt to break it and Darrill finally got the extra leverage using his arm to help choke him out. Oh well. I like Rashad and I think he could easily kick Rampage’s ass especially since that pussy chickened out on the fight. (Rampage commented that Rashad wanted to hold on to the belt longer so he refused a fight. Riiiight, like he wanted to get his face destroyed by Lyoto Machida over your pansy ass… that totally makes sense.)

I slept in until 1000 today. I was happy about that. I got on my computer just fiddling around, putting off what I needed to do. There’s a song called “Breathe Into Me” by Red that I discovered and like. I finally got to writing a letter to Ms. Sexy X. Well, it was more of a poem I had written for her a while back. I have one more as well. I also sent her a long email about some stuff. I don’t know when she’ll read that as she doesn’t have access to it. I was going to send via regular mail but she won’t see that for a while and it didn’t feel right to send it through that. It took a little while for both things to get them perfect. Then I went to the hospital to fix some billing issues. I just got back and ate.

I’ve gotten a bunch out of the way today. I feel good to some extent. There’s a depression looming overhead so I can’t get too excited. I have to come up with ideas. Oy.

A new Vampire Diaries is on tonight. I like the show well enough but it’s a bit too… teen/high school/dramatic for my tastes. That said I read the books and they’re only loosely following them but I still enjoy watching them. True Blood doesn’t start again until next summer I think. So fucking far away.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkXPw_lorew

Posted in Exercise, Ms. Sexy X, Music, True Blood, UFC, Vampire Diaries, Work | No Comments »

Little Of Everything

Wednesday, October 21st, 2009

Today was a waste of a day. I woke up, went to work, fiddled around with a machine for the whole shift, then went home. I’m getting impatient, I need to go.

When I got home I grabbed a Pepsi and head for the roof to watch the sunset. It was actually warm out so I had put on shorts and a T-shirt. It was pretty. All I could think of was why this is happening, how can such hate, malice, and evil thrive in a world so beautiful. It’s fucking disappointing. I was looking for inspiration on what to do, where to go. I’m at a loss really and that’s even more frustrating.

From there I went on to the back deck with a football and just threw to some chairs for a while. The deck is rather large. I threw the ball off the deck a few times for fun and ran up and down the hill to get it. I did that for a good bit, about 20 minutes I’d say. After that I did a bunch of pullups, 40 to be exact. I also did 40 knee ups. My abs are burning. I’m sure I’m strengthening them though I wish I had washboard status going on. Well, it’s no big deal but it’d be nice.

I watched the new NCIS. It was a forgettable episode. Tony (Michael) wasn’t as funny as normal. Something just seemed off about the whole episode, perhaps because it was themed? I’m not sure. I still enjoy it and the killer was easy to guess, I did right off the bat. My suspicions were confirmed the longer they went after everyone else… the lack of talking about that person made me know it’d be her.

Sons of Anarchy was pretty good. The crew were up to their shenanigans again and a lot of things happened. I’ll write up that post later. I can’t wait until next week’s. Oy.

I also watched Enemy of the State after the show. I forgot how long that movie is. It’s a classic though, I like it.

Now I’m going to go eat leftovers and I don’t know what else. Maybe I’ll go to bed early. I’m sort of tired. I just don’t want to lie here thinking. I know I’m sort of sad/depressed but I’m not letting it phase me. I’m just neutral right now. I don’t know how long I can hold myself at that. I just have to keep doing what I have to do and maybe things will fall into place. I’m trying, all I need is a chance.

Posted in Exercise, Sons of Anarchy, Thoughts, Work | No Comments »

I Hate Cleaning

Monday, October 19th, 2009

I have a love/hate relationship with cleaning. It’s so nice to have clean things, it does take your mind off of things, and there’s the personal satisfaction of doing it yourself. On the other hand it is time consuming (which can be an advantage at times,) takes hard work, usually makes you ache, you have to breathe up chemicals, you get dirty – possibly cleaning up nasty substances, and it’s boring (which can also be an advantage.) Overall, it’d be nice to have a clean place without having to do the work but I would find myself doing some of the work at times. Besides, I don’t know if I want anyone touching my stuff.

I cleaned today at work. It took hours and I made a mess and cleaned it back up after I cleaned the machine up. I’d like to get it spic and span but the angles are such that it hurts to get in there to clean and since chemicals are just put right back in it is pointless getting it spotless. I did make sure it was damned clean though. The chemicals reek and stain. It ate up all my time but I’m feeling the soreness in my bad hand.

I’m feeling better today. I have no idea where things are going, I’m going to keep trying to work hard to move forward in a good direction with my Ms. Sexy X. I have to take it one step at a time and hope she comes around. I’m trying, that’s all I can do. Yes, she is that important to me. People may not understand my resolve but when I lock onto something I want there’s no stopping me. (I mean that in a totally non-creepy way. I know, you’re laughing and saying “yeah right!”) I love her and miss her terribly. I know she knows that. I know she misses me and loves me. She’s just struggling right now and I’m stuck not being able to support her properly. I’d give up forever to touch her. I want to give the world to her but I know not how. It pains me deeply, it strikes at my manhood… my pride. Blah.

Tonight I’m going to grill up some shrimp and watch MNF at a friend’s place. That’s about 2 hours away. I think for now I’ll chill outside since it’s actually bearable and I plan on watching the sunset.

How can something so beautiful be in so much pain? A cruel twist indeed.

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Blah Day

Saturday, September 26th, 2009

I went to bed early last night, right at around 1AM. I was tired I guess and I have nothing to do. I’m bored and lonely. This morning I woke up to it still raining which should have been my cue to keep sleeping. I did sneak maybe another 45 minutes in but it wasn’t really sleep and I did dream a little. I plan on sleeping in tomorrow too but my body never lets me. Meh, oh well.

I had an ailing stomach and went to the bathroom several times this morning. I was hoping it was just from last night’s pizza. Unfortunately, it hit me several times today. I haven’t felt too bad really besides going to the bathroom. I’m hoping I’m not sick, I don’t feel it. I haven’t eaten any supper yet, I’m a bit afraid too.

Work was busy so it kept me occupied most of the time today. Florida took on UK today and I knew it was going to be a beatdown. I watched the first quarter before I tuned out. 31-0 and Hartline had 2-6 throwing with 1 whole yard. Wow that sucks. I believe the final score was 41-7 not that it mattered. Tebow went to the hospital after taking a hard hit though I figure he’s just shook up. I know there’s going to be a lot of drinking in Bluegrass nation tonight.

I had one strange black woman looking down at a phone or something and she snapped her head looking at me all exorcism style and says “Jesus is lord” and she snaps her head back to where she was looking. I said “ooooh kay” casually and she says “sorry I just wanted you to know.” I just gave her an odd stare and continued on.

I have been dreaming all day when I can. My dreams are simple but enormous. I’m nervous about going out there, this may be my chance. I haven’t heard from Ms. Sexy X in… is it 8 days now? I think that’s right. I’m worried but I know she’s fine, it’s just tough. I don’t know, I’m having a hard time saying what I want to say on here.

I have simple dreams and I’m so close. Please, please work out. Arrrgh!

Posted in College Football, Health, Ms. Sexy X, University of Kentucky, Work | No Comments »

SO FUCKING PISSED!

Friday, September 25th, 2009

Where do I fucking start?

Okay… so today was okay. My morning went by fine. I’ve been thinking about my Ms. Sexy X, it’s been a week now. It sucks but what can I do? I’m keeping a good attitude. I’m worried as usual but that’s nothing new. I haven’t felt depressed… well I had a moment but it was only a moment. Overall, I’ve been feeling good.

I was teasing a manager of mine and she decided to get smart with me so I got smart back with her. She comes back at me later to do the same thing and I was a bit pissed but I think she was just messing with me. The way she did it was really smart and you know what I gave her? The same thing with a heavy dose of sarcasm. I just didn’t care.

After work I got on my pull up bar. I did 4 sets of various 7 reps. I used to be able to do 10-11 but when I stopped 3 months ago… that went downhill so I’m working my way back up. I maxed at 8. Those straps are beastly. I cannot hold my legs out straight but I can hold them out somewhat. I can only hold for maybe 30 seconds, to be honest I just go until I drop. But I follow up each pull up set with a set of 10 reps of bringing the knees up to the chest and back down while using my arms to make sure I’m holding myself up straight. That shit works the abs, I can feel it. Whether that does anything for me I don’t know but we’ll see.

What pissed me off is I got off work to log on here and immediately got a virus. God damned iframe injection again. Is there anyway I can block this shit? I don’t use iframes and I don’t want it. I installed several antivirus plugins for this blog and they didn’t do anything. I’ve contacted my hosts and they’re looking into it. I’ve also changed the file permissions. I fucking HATE hackers.

I do apologize if there is a rare reader that even sees this blog (not just for the content! ;-)) I’m not adding anything to this site like that… I HATE popups. This is invisible so you can’t see the popup but it does open up an unsecure connection to a malicious website. Apparently this type of attack is happening a lot lately so I’m not alone in that regards. It still sucks. I have to go in and edit the files or overwrite them with the backups which pisses me off. I try to do that every morning in order to catch it (the attacks come at 3AM it seems like.) Unfortunately, I had to work so the soonest I could look was this evening. I hope no one but me got infected (which I immediately fixed thanks to a recent system restore.)

I’m not sure how but the attacker will somehow inject one line of code that opens an iframe on the user’s computer which opens a website that you can’t see. Hence “iframe injection” is what it is called. They insert it into the index.php or index.html files. It’s easy to detect but you’d think there’d be an easy way to block it too.

Then I go to eat at a restaurant tonight and the waiter was horrible. At first it took a while but it was busy in there so we chalked it up to that. The place started clearing out shortly after we sat down and they were trying to order beer (I stuck with ice water, thankfully.) We put our order in pretty quick so it came out in a timely manner. They had empty beer glasses and ordered more by the time the pizza came out they still didn’t have a refill. As we ate he never checked up on us. Finally they ordered more beer by the time I asked for a to go box. It took quite a few minutes to get that… whatever. The next time he came around they ordered more beer and I asked for my check. It took a while to get the check, again no problem. I had my card ready when he handed it to me but he gave it to me and turned around and was flirting with two ugly ass women. WHAT THE FUCK? Then he wandered off. It took 30 minutes before he ran my card and when he did he managed to add a beer to my ticket. I waited 15 minutes for him to come back and when he didn’t, I got a manager and complained. He fixed the ticket but I wasn’t sure if he’d do anything. The store manager is real good about this stuff so I’ll email her. I didn’t leave a tip nor will I sit in his section again. That reminds me of this one waitress I think I got fired… well the final straw I’d guess. That’s for another time.

Now I’m here in a pissy mood and alone in bed. I hate that shit. I just want to wrap my arms around my woman and just lay there with her next to me… gawd. Now I’m in a pissy AND sad mood. Ha, I’m a dork.

Posted in Exercise, Health, Ms. Sexy X, Work | No Comments »

FOOOORE!

Saturday, September 5th, 2009

Nope, there’s no golf here.

Yesterday at work was incredibly boring. So what do I do? I get a Nerf football and toss it around. Yes, it’s a stupid idea but I don’t give a fuck. There’s a very fat and rather slow guy I work with. He’s nice but I’m just pointing out the obvious facts. His coordination sucks too. So I toss the football at him and watching him try to catch is hilarious. I know his throwing is atrocious as well. He’s walking down the aisle and I holler his name and he turns around and cocks his arm to throw it (in a weird way too.) I had just noticed a woman out of my peripheral right behind me so my eyes widen and I’m about to tell him no but it’s too late. He launches the thing to where even Shaq couldn’t reach it. FUUUUCK. I leap as high as I could and stretch my arm way out and it’s still over me. I’m not super tall nor have a high vertical but still. As I come down I look over my shoulder to watch. The woman is oblivious as the ball comes down and smacks her square on the forehead with a light “whoomph.” It is so fucking hilarious that I wanted to burst out laughing. Since it was partially my fault, I couldn’t and apologized for the guy that threw it and made myself look good. Well, I wasn’t the one that threw it. Anyways, I walked off so I could laugh hard about it. She just said “it’s alright, I work with little kids every day.” That was just as funny because she doesn’t know how true that is for him.

Today I had a young woman who worked at Hooters. She brought in modeling pictures of herself almost naked, tastefully done. They were definite professionals. She didn’t mind me looking at them though I only needed to see the top one to know. I explained the copyright situation to her and we discussed it for quite a while. She got angry but wasn’t really blaming me. I ended up getting 4 managers over there and the head one said the decision defaults to me and I told her exactly what I had been saying. She wasn’t too pleased. Oh well. I was heated at one point and wanted to tell her off but I know anger gets you nowhere and to kill them with kindness is so much better. It’s verrrry hard to take the high road. At one point I offered to hold the pictures until she obtained a copyright release to which she says “and leave half naked pictures of me here for others to see? Uh, no.” I wanted to just say “bitch, you showed me already, you did it in public, you offered to show others, you said you had no problem with your body or showing it off… so this fake modesty bit is just bullshit because you can’t get a release.” Of course I bit my tongue but that royally pissed me off.

My only relief for today was to go to a friend’s place to eat and watch college football. Most of the games haven’t been all too interesting today but it is football. Crimson Tide went up on the Hokies by a TD. SEC FTW! I taste tested the Nathan’s side by side with the Angus Ballpark and my conclusion was the Nathan’s is indeed a little bit plumper, juicier, and tastier. I’m going with it from now on.

On a great note, Ms. Sexy X did email me yesterday afternoon with something I was waiting on. That excited me a bunch. It’s helped me feel good today and hopefully will carry me through for a while. I still haven’t talked with her and I sure do miss her. Oy.

Posted in College Football, Food, Ms. Sexy X, Sports, Work | No Comments »

Sleepy

Monday, August 31st, 2009

I haven’t gotten a whole lot of sleep in the past few days. I normally go to bed around 3AM especially with Ms. Sexy X calling late. I did some hour switching temporarily so I’ve been getting up at 6AM for work. That isn’t a helluva lot of sleep. She’ll hopefully call again tonight. I about fell asleep at work… okay I didn’t but it was realllly boring today and that didn’t help. I did almost go to sleep on break. I was going to take a nap on lunch but I had to use the bathroom and I figured I’d go home and do that and then sleep. That didn’t happen. Oh well. When I got home after work I showered and went to bed. I basically laid there for two hours. I ALMOST fell asleep several times but it never came. So when I got up I had one of those lack-of-sleep-headaches (that suck!) and I ate some leftover pizza and lasagna and had a Pepsi on the roof. Yeah, I watched the sunset again. It’s chilly here so being up on a breezy roof wasn’t the best thing ever.

I was feeling ill this morning so I didn’t eat breakfast… which always makes it worse. I ended up drinking some coffee and normally I never do. I LOVE the smell of coffee and it makes me feel better but I needed the caffeine and the taste wasn’t repulsive. Surprisingly, it actually helped a bit. I would have had more except I got a Sobe Orange Cream and it was gooooood. I like that better than Jones soda. It’s smoother, tastier, 20 ozs in a nice glass bottle, and only a dollar. Yum! The only downside is that it looks disgusting. Oh well.

What’s on my plate for the rest of the night? I’m watching the Vikings/Texans game. I’ll watch and review the True Blood tonight I think. Hopefully, Ms. Sexy X will call again tonight. With this headache and another early shift tomorrow and this damned lingering cough, I may cut it early tonight. I don’t know yet. I wish she’d call a bit earlier in the night but she calls right before she goes to sleep. Right now… I feel awake and fine so hopefully it will last the night.

I was feeling a little depressed today. Not bad at all, just a tinge. I don’t like being here anymore and I hate waiting. Luckily, I’ve been too tired to dwell on that so it wasn’t too bad today. I could have used that nap. I’d go to bed now but I just can’t manage to fall asleep before 2AM as shown by my wreck of a 2 hour nap after work.

Posted in Drinks, Health, Ms. Sexy X, Myself, Work | No Comments »

My Beautiful Disaster